52 days…

A brief one tonight- I’m off to my course soon. It looks like it will be good … but I haven’t done my homework yet so I need to go catch up.
School was good today. The ANZAC service was sad and I shed a tear or two.
I saw the psych-lady again.  She thinks I’m resilient.  She thinks K has very intelligent both emotionally and intellectually.  We know this already.  She was worried about H though … she thought he was dominant and fidgety – on the ASD or ADHD spectrum further than I thought.  This didn’t fit with what I know of him.  I listened and thought … no, K can manipulate him just fine and isn’t dominated by him … but she’d never show that side of her in public.  Also – H had just spent 40 minutes in the waiting room before she ever met him.  When I remembered this, I pointed out that this was a loooooong time for a 5-year-old to wait and she agreed.  She’s sent me home with a sheet for me and his teacher to see where he sits in relation to his peers … and as I’m in that classroom twice a day, I get a good view of the kids – H is probably one of the more confident and intelligent kids … and Mrs McG told me as much about a week ago.  He does have anger issues, but frankly *I* have anger issues about this complete fuck-up in life.  *I* think the whole deal is not FUCKING fair.  (Yep, I swore again.  I’m that mad).


I’m back.  The course was fantastic.  I really think it will help the kids and I deal with this.  “How to Talk So Kid’s Will Listen and Listen So Kid’s will Talk”.  Bad Hair.  Bad Acting.  Bad Props.  Brilliant Advice.

It’s not on next week as D is away, but there’s another 4 weeks to go and so far, it’s been useful for finding out how the kids are feeling and getting them to do stuff without going bat shit crazy first.

Memory of the day:

The hat.  The one we put on your coffin.  The one you found discarded by the side of the road when you were 20.  The one that had been run over and was really just a piece of felt held together with string.  The one you wore to all RY functions and other important events.  You loved that hat.  You saw it’s character.  Says a lot for how you saw people.

You have the kindest heart and most generous soul of anyone I’ve ever known.

I love you.