63 days….

For a public holiday, today was OK.  I’ve kept myself and the kids busy.  This seems to be a good strategy.

I got the kids to paint pictures on canvas for mother’s day.  They did such a good job that I think next weekend I’ll get them to paint a picture of doing something with you.

Mum and Dad came over and Mum and I wrote a few more sympathy thank you cards – tears were shed, but remembering how many people care about is was a good thing.

J&T dropped in too – it was actually really good talking to J.  She is very sad.  The kids really enjoyed playing with T and he put up with them begging for piggy-back rides and he kept them running around for over an hour.
I asked J about H in her capacity as both a prep teacher and as a behaviour management specialist who has had a  long association with H … and she sees a sad little boy. Not ADHD or ASD.  This backs up what his kindy teachers have said as well.  and my Mum who’s had 40 years experience as a teacher.  and Aunt S who worked in an early intervention centre for quite a few years back in the 80s.   People who know H well don’t see ASD or ADHD.  Taking a snapshot of current behaviour therefore does not give an accurate view of  H.
I think the anger he has been displaying has decreased markedly over the past few weeks and he is working through grief as only a 5-year-old boy can.  If I genuinely thought he had a behaviour issue, I’d go there.  But I really really don’t see it*.  So I’m not going there.

Memory of the day….

You leaving to go to Cape York with your brother with a #2 hair cut and a clean-shaven face (but for the mo).  You returning from CYP with a face full of beard.  I said at the time that if I didn’t know who you were, I’d cross the street to keep out of your way!  Your beard was legendary.  Ned Kelly indeed!

Love you with all my heart



*H is a “different thinker” but his social understandings are good and he reciprocates behaviours well.   He maintains  eye contact appropriately in conversations and has a good understanding of gesture etc, good relationships with other children / easily makes friends and is on the same level as his peers wrt friendships, spontaneous seeking of interaction and enjoyment etc.  His stims are no more than mine or most of the population (he hums: I twist my hair – we all have stims of one sort or another).  He does maintain higher than normal focus for a 5 year old, but not overly so (e.g. he prefers to build than draw but will draw if required), no ocd type routines / can cope with change, good physical awareness (not clumsy / good motor skills).  Not that I know very much about ASD, but given the above I don’t think he’d meet the criteria that I’m familiar with…