94 days….

As I sit here, organising yet another copy of your death certificate to be sent off to yet another place that requires it, I’m looking through the family file – full of death certificates for you and both  your parents.
It also contains  your parent’s will – the subject of so much controversy last year.  They made their wills in 1988 and who would have known then just how completely shit life was going to turn out to be in another 10 years time?….. your father was taken in 2007 and your mother no doubt already fully aware that she had the breast cancer that would ultimately kill her in 2009. Who knew?

That amount of shite within the space of a few years is enough to do most people in, and yet, we had an even bigger complete and utter fuck-up waiting for us exactly a year after we lost your mother.    … for you to be killed exactly a year to the day after your mother was taken from us is a  torment which is   too much to bear.

I’ve stopped asking what else can go wrong because life just keeps knocking us down.


In other news, I burned dinner and fed the kids iced finger buns instead.  I just could not be fucked cooking another meal.

…and yeah, you may have noticed that ‘fucked’  / ‘fucking’ is now accounting for every second word that comes out of my mouth.  I don’t fucking care who the fuck hears me fucking swear.

I’m fucking over this shit.