330 days…

Can you believe our boy is in Grade 1??  I am finding this quite daunting … possibly because I want so badly to go back in time to when we were a whole family.


Tom turned up early this morning to do some work on  finishing the drain.  I didn’t know he was coming.  Luckily I was clothed when I looked out our usually-private bedroom window.  He didn’t finish the drain though, so obviously I’ll need to be wary of opening the curtains for a while.

Oh – and I will have to wait for the quote but I’m pretty sure that I know who I want to build the deck.  I think you would even like this bloke (and his wife is my aide so double plus).


Your sister J and her husband T dropped by this afternoon.  It was good to see them and I just told the that their money for the farm would be late.   I explained that the payment has coincided with me getting no pay and an expensive drain needing to be dug. I don’t think they are happy but they didn’t bat an eyelid.


So today, has just been …. meh.

It hasn’t sucked as much as the days before Christmas. I haven’t cried much.
But it hasn’t been great either.
I wonder if I’ll ever experience happiness again….

I don’t have high hopes.

Perhaps this is the best I can hope for … days filled with  meh.   Calm.  Boring.  Dull. Nothing.

The world is now shades of grey. ….Shades of Meh.

Which I suppose, is better than pitch black.

I miss you.

I love you.