270 days…
I ended up having a quarter of a sleeping tablet at 2:30am …after tossing and turning for 2 hours I figured that I would be useless without SOME sleep anyway.
It worked OK : I got some extra sleep.
I needed it – the boys were feral today.
Not boys: just one boy.
As it turns out, he is apparently medicated at home and Mum is a bit forgetful with the ADHD meds … and it SHOWS. He just couldn’t keep it together for even a minute at a time. Just not possible.
Still, we made it through the day.
Oh – and I was told some gossip today which is probably true and explains a lot about the deputy and his little habit of fucking with me wrt to work next year. My opinion of him has dramatically slipped.
Explains a lot of crap that’s been going on though.
It just makes me even shittier that it was you that got hit with the SMITE button that day when the arseholes of the world abound.
It’s just not fucking fair.
I’m off to bed soon – I just spent 45 minutes consoling H – he just misses you so much and it’s all I can do to hold him and talk about all his memories of you.
I reiterate: it’s just not fucking fair.
You were a rare breed – a good bloke. I’m discovering just how very rare good blokes are….
I miss you.
I love you.
XA
Letters to my husband 
not fair. Completely completely illogical. (and stupid).
You are right about there being so few decent chaps out there. When I married OO 25 years ago, his mom had been alone nearly a decade. She took the time to explain that Albert was a man not to be taken lightly and that she had no interest in seeing if there were another like him. She knew he was the last good one. After living with her second son for these years has shown me that the same thing applies to Albert’s boys.
Like she and you, I cannot imagine being with anyone else either. Sending hugs.
It is just spot on. The good guys are so rare…it makes me feel so frustrated when the bad people get away with everything. I feel your frustration that life sometimes just doesn’t seem fair.